We Are ALL Moms
We recently discovered Ciera needs glasses. We noticed that the type on her Kindle was rather large, and even while reading with her grandparents, they noticed she had to look closely at the screen.
If you have read my blog before, you might recall that the kids have Medicaid until they are eighteen as a result of being adopted through foster care. In some ways, this has allowed us to have great services at no cost, and allow us to redirect the funds we would have had to spend on insurance and copays to the other needs they have-and to build a college fund that is starting quite late.
Great news-the Target Optician takes Medicaid. Bob took Ciera there for an appointment, and low and behold, our girl needs glasses for reading the board and for a book.
Upon getting the prescription for glasses, Bob began the search to get the lenses made. Turns out, this is a way different experience.
After about ten phone calls, we finally found a place about fifteen minutes from home that would fill the glasses prescription, but they have to send them out and it takes six weeks for them to come back. That seemed excessive. And it appeared that the reason for this was Medicaid.
Fortunately, we are blessed. We have resources to pay for these ourselves. Off to Costco we went, ordered frames-buy one set, get the second 40% off. All in, we probably spent $130. The sales associate was fantastic, the return time a week, and the service great. So-little plug for that retailer.
While $130 was not an expected item this month, it's going to be fine.
I can't get over this though. Most moms who are on Medicaid don't have $130. They don't have $13. They don't have a Costco membership, for the love of Jesus. They don't have a car to drive to the only place that offers them free glasses for their kid. They might have to haul all their kids on a bus-which has a cost-twenty miles away to the only place that will give their kid glasses. And who knows what the glasses will look like? They won't be blue and green, like Ciera's. That kid won't have fun choosing them. And that mom will have a very different experience than we did.
What the heck is going on? Why, as a society, are we ok with treating those that have the least, with services that are almost inaccessible and subpar. I hear comments all the time that "she should have made different choices"....or "well, if they study hard, they can get out of that situation"....are you kidding me? We are asking single mothers to care for children with no money, often no partner, a job that pays hourly that she may lose when the kids have a sick or snow day, and then, on her day off, we ask her to commute with her babies to find a place that will provide the healthcare she needs to raise the children we, from our glass houses, say "well, they should work hard and rise above". I'm going to keep this real. Before you judge from high on the hill in your glass house, I promise that the single mom who "should have made better choices" wasn't thinking that the man she was in love with and thought loved her, was going to leave her and the babies all while not paying any child support.
Honestly, this Medicaid situation with the children has been a blessing for us financially but that is only because it is just our safety net. We have all the choices. We have employers who support us, with benefits that allow us the best. We have an FSA that allows us to see family therapists-who by the way, are typically not covered by Medicaid. What? We don't allow families in desperation and upheaval access to therapists?
Next time you are at the pharmacy, hospital, or doctors office and the mom in front of you pulls out a Medicaid card, give her a break. Imagine what she's already gone through to get to that office. What has she already done that day? Did she get time to rest after she worked all night? Does she have the money to buy orange juice and children's ibuprofen, which by the way, are not always covered on her grocery plan? Where's she taking her children home to after this? Is it warm? Does she have someone to help if she catches what her kid has?
Or maybe that mom is like me. She adopted children from foster care. On any given day, there are approximately 428,000 children in the foster care system-and about 50,000 might be adopted. Maybe
We are all moms. We all just want to do the best we can.
If you have read my blog before, you might recall that the kids have Medicaid until they are eighteen as a result of being adopted through foster care. In some ways, this has allowed us to have great services at no cost, and allow us to redirect the funds we would have had to spend on insurance and copays to the other needs they have-and to build a college fund that is starting quite late.
Great news-the Target Optician takes Medicaid. Bob took Ciera there for an appointment, and low and behold, our girl needs glasses for reading the board and for a book.
Upon getting the prescription for glasses, Bob began the search to get the lenses made. Turns out, this is a way different experience.
After about ten phone calls, we finally found a place about fifteen minutes from home that would fill the glasses prescription, but they have to send them out and it takes six weeks for them to come back. That seemed excessive. And it appeared that the reason for this was Medicaid.
Fortunately, we are blessed. We have resources to pay for these ourselves. Off to Costco we went, ordered frames-buy one set, get the second 40% off. All in, we probably spent $130. The sales associate was fantastic, the return time a week, and the service great. So-little plug for that retailer.
While $130 was not an expected item this month, it's going to be fine.
I can't get over this though. Most moms who are on Medicaid don't have $130. They don't have $13. They don't have a Costco membership, for the love of Jesus. They don't have a car to drive to the only place that offers them free glasses for their kid. They might have to haul all their kids on a bus-which has a cost-twenty miles away to the only place that will give their kid glasses. And who knows what the glasses will look like? They won't be blue and green, like Ciera's. That kid won't have fun choosing them. And that mom will have a very different experience than we did.
What the heck is going on? Why, as a society, are we ok with treating those that have the least, with services that are almost inaccessible and subpar. I hear comments all the time that "she should have made different choices"....or "well, if they study hard, they can get out of that situation"....are you kidding me? We are asking single mothers to care for children with no money, often no partner, a job that pays hourly that she may lose when the kids have a sick or snow day, and then, on her day off, we ask her to commute with her babies to find a place that will provide the healthcare she needs to raise the children we, from our glass houses, say "well, they should work hard and rise above". I'm going to keep this real. Before you judge from high on the hill in your glass house, I promise that the single mom who "should have made better choices" wasn't thinking that the man she was in love with and thought loved her, was going to leave her and the babies all while not paying any child support.
Honestly, this Medicaid situation with the children has been a blessing for us financially but that is only because it is just our safety net. We have all the choices. We have employers who support us, with benefits that allow us the best. We have an FSA that allows us to see family therapists-who by the way, are typically not covered by Medicaid. What? We don't allow families in desperation and upheaval access to therapists?
Next time you are at the pharmacy, hospital, or doctors office and the mom in front of you pulls out a Medicaid card, give her a break. Imagine what she's already gone through to get to that office. What has she already done that day? Did she get time to rest after she worked all night? Does she have the money to buy orange juice and children's ibuprofen, which by the way, are not always covered on her grocery plan? Where's she taking her children home to after this? Is it warm? Does she have someone to help if she catches what her kid has?
Or maybe that mom is like me. She adopted children from foster care. On any given day, there are approximately 428,000 children in the foster care system-and about 50,000 might be adopted. Maybe
We are all moms. We all just want to do the best we can.
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